We're so back

In slightly different form

I watch a lot of random stuff on YouTube. Everything from travel adventures and people building homesteads, to a man attempting to befriend a tiny spider and someone making a red bull energy drink 100x more potent.

I have diverse interests and the algo is unreal… what can I say!?

A few nights ago, the algo delivered a video of a man documenting his journey of going phone-less for 30 days. I was intrigued by the thumbnail.

I had recently noticed my screen time creeping up (thanks to YouTube shorts) and became aware of a more dysregulated state in my everyday life (which I attributed partially to my phone). Interestingly, this dysregulation was perceived by others, with one friend specifically using the word “frantic” to describe my state 🤪

So, I clicked. And watched. And for some reason, was surprised when the man significantly improved his mental health (as measured by a variety of tests including brain scans) after just 30 days.

It was extreme, though — he did not use his phone for anything. No Google Maps, no Spotify, nothing (it’s unclear how he called people but I am guessing a landline lol).

So that got me thinking… could I do something like that? How would that impact my life? If I were to do it, could I do it in a less extreme way (Goggins, is that you?)?

I let it marinate overnight and awoke with a deeper awareness of how I was going to use my phone that morning. It was short-lived though, as I quickly reverted to old habits scrolling through the various apps during my morning routine.

Unbeknownst to me right then, this morning would be a pleasant break in routine.

I decided to skip my workout and go out for a matcha, something I had not done in a while. I figured a change of scenery would be nice.

I arrived at my current favorite coffee shop, Sati Coffee (Sati is a Buddhist term for “mindfulness” so you can guess the vibe), and overheard the baristas discussing video games. One barista was surprised that the other didn’t play video games, which I found amusing. Me being in a social mood, chimed in, saying I didn’t either… that I instead watch random videos on YouTube (see above).

As I shared the phone detox video from the night prior and how I was considering doing something similar, I noticed a man across the shop perk up. At the next pause in conversation, I turned my attention toward him and asked if he had been listening.

He said that he had and shared that he had already cut most of his phone use… and that it improved his life in many ways.

Intrigued, I walked towards his table and noticed Rick Rubin’s “The Creative Act: A Way of Being” (one of my favorites) sitting next to him. I knew this conversation was about to get juicy.

He went on to share that he was currently writing his second book and that cutting out his phone allowed his creativity to flow much easier, in the form of writing, playing music, and reading.

“But aren’t those just distractions in different forms?” I asked.

He claimed they were different… that being in those states was more grounding and that his overall state of being was more attuned, allowing him to connect better with people.

A hint at something spiritual?! Now I was really hooked.

We dove deep and spoke for two hours straight. Neither of us had gotten any work done, but that clearly wasn’t part of today’s plan. Neither of us had intended to be at the coffee shop this morning, yet here we were, deep into a conversation about life simply because of a YouTube video I watched the night prior.

I call that a synchronicity.

It was fun. And I took down his number (since he did not have his phone) and joked that I would not be insulted when he takes 48 hours to reply. We left as new friends, but something deeper persisted inside of me…

I spent the remainder of the day thinking more about my phone habits and noticing the urge to reach for my phone after any pause in the external world.

Frankly, it was jarring to see how dependent I had become on this device. But I quickly realized why I was hooked (which was not entirely novel, but it felt that way at the time).

My phone was a key to practically limitless dopamine. This comes in the form of obvious entertainment, like social media and in more subtle forms like emails, calls, and texts.

Let me explain.

So much of the good news in my life lately (and maybe almost my entire adult life) had come through a phone. Whether it was a text invitation to hang out from a friend, an exciting email from work, or even a new match notification on Hinge, I was getting hits of dopamine from each buzz in my pocket.

Over time, my brain was being conditioned to reach for the phone for this dopamine. And when notifications were not enough, it craved more and led to endless scrolling of social media (and inevitably downloading YouTube shorts).

In essence, I was constantly waiting for my next fix. And for what felt like the first time, I was seeing how destructive it was to my overall wellbeing.

Unreal, right?

With this newfound clarity, I decided I was going to slowly wean off and start to take back control (the key word here is slowly, sorry Goggins).

The easy fix? Deleting all social media apps (except for work) and turning off all notifications, minus calls and texts. And depending on how that feels, I may take it a step further and turn off text notifications too 😱

If you’re worried about hearing from me less, that’s valid (though I’ve never been one to converse over text). The good news is, this decision also comes with a decision to start writing again. So there’s something.

I’ll report back shortly. And if this inspires you to examine your own phone habits and you feel compelled to share your learnings, I’d love to hear about it!

In the meantime, I’ll leave you with some other updates, since a few people have recommended I document the journey to building frvr.

• We launched! After several months of delays (classic startup life), we launched in the beginning of May!

• Feedback and early traction have been strong! One Instagram post featuring the product has over 225K views and another has over 100K views (100% organic traffic). This has led to early sales, both online and in-person at local events!

• We’re in several talks with artists for collabs, which is what I am most excited about for the growth of the company. One of my life highlights was creating and hand-delivering a fan for my fav artist, Subtronics (the cover photo to this post). I am manifesting a collab with him… and it will happen one day.

Of course, the success has not come without its challenges.

We have yet to find a channel with a high ROI. In-person vending is incredibly laborious (making it hard to justify the ROI when accounting for time), our ambassador program has taken longer than anticipated to see results, and I don’t feel comfortable starting paid social media this early on in the company. We’ve also struggled to find the right manufacturing partner, but are optimistic this one will ease soon.

When it gets really hard, I do my best to practice gratitude. This was the life I asked for and I am so grateful I’m able to pursue my passion. Plus, I’m in Denver now, surrounded by new people, new energy, and lots of nature 🌲 and bass music 🫨

Outside of frvr, yes, I am still on the path to pursue psychedelic facilitation. I have yet to find a program that lights me up the way frvr does and (not “but”) I trust it will come when it’s time. Oh and I have started teaching yoga (a year after YTT). Namaste.

Love you all,

Jacob

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